June 15, 2011
Johannes Ruckstuhl
Action, Adventure, Film
3D, Angels & Demons, Astrid Berges-Frisbey, At World's End, Bill Nighy, Blackbeard, Chicago, Dead Man's Chest, Disney, DVD, Film, film music, Fountain of Youth, Geoffrey Rush, Gore Verbinski, Hans Zimmer, Ian McShane, Inception, Jack Sparrow, Jerry Bruckheimer, Keira Knightley, movies, On Stranger Tides, Orlando Bloom, Penelope Cruz, picture, Pirates of the Caribbean, poster, review, Richard Griffiths, Rob Marshall, Rodrigo y Gabriela, Sam Claflin, score, soundtrack, Ted Elliott, Terry Rossio, The Curse of the Black Pearl
Despite all the claims that “At World’s End” would be the last of Jack Sparrow’s escapades, the promise of booty in these waters was enough to tempt both Disney and super-producer Jerry Bruckheimer. After all, despite lukewarm receptions from critics and most movie-goers, the second and and third films in the series earned Disney in the region of a billion dollars each. And so, having dropped Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley and director Gore Verbinski, the pirates set sail once more with Bruckheimer promising a style closer to the swashbuckler spirit of the original. Aside from “Chicago” director Rob Marshall, new crew members include heavyweights Penelope Cruz and Ian McShane, next to Geoffrey Rush returning as Barbossa and of course, the one and only captain Jack. Far from a face-lift however, the end product reeks of a dead formula and will have eyes rolling with yet-another-pointless-sequel dissatisfaction.
Picking up with a loose end from “At World’s End,” “On Stranger Tides” begins with Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) captured and brought before King George (Richard Griffiths whom you may remember from the “Harry Potter” series) in London, charged with assisting expedition to the Fountain of Youth led by the now peg-legged, wig-sporting and privateering Barbossa. Sparrow being Sparrow and the British guards being incompetent as ever, Jack escapes but instead ends up on “The Queen Anne’s Revenge,” the ship of notorious pirate Blackbeard (McShane) and his daughter Angelica (Cruz), who are both after the fountain as well, for different reasons. The fountain, it is said will grant eternal youth to whoever drinks from it. Along the predictable routes of the quest, there’s zombies and mermaids to be fought, Blackbeard’s temper to fear and Depp’s still damn good comedic timing to contend with. Penelope Cruz is without doubt the best addition to the cast; she’s a good counterpart to Depp and the pair would have considerably more chemistry if the plot permitted it. Your ability to tolerate their nonsense will depend largely on whether you found Depp’s Sparrow charming in the first place but together their interplay amounts to all the film can muster in entertainment.
The actual fountain plot feels extremely tired in its entirety. Even though he’s an excellent choice to play Blackbeard, Ian McShane’s role can never top Bill Nighy and with the exception of one clever scene in which six pistols are laid out, there’s no evil to be felt. What drives him, why is he so evil? This is what made Davey Jones and Barbossa so compelling and Blackbeard has nothing to serve up in return. A romantic sub-plot involving newcomers Sam Claflin and French model Astrid Berges-Frisbey as cleric and mermaid respectively is equally devoid of all life, never mind believability. Perhaps worst of all, “On Stranger Tides” never leaves a moment to breathe, it tries to pile action upon action, as long as it’s always loud, with plenty of crash bang, people will be entertained, right? All these points draw inevitably to the main x everyone will mark on the map (enough with the pirate puns already!) as to reason for all this mayhem.
Marshall has his hands full, trying to keep the huge, lumbering ship on course but can never muster enough style to inject a breath of fresh air. But then, the director was never the problem of this series. The blame must be decidedly laid at the door of screenwriters Ted Elliott and Terry Rossio. The pair have become entangled within the mechanisms of a genius idea they once created, their personal fountain of inspiration dried up. While “Dead Man’s Chest” and “At World’s End” were over-laden with confusing (but nevertheless interesting) storylines, the fourth entry is more straight forward in its quest plot but the dialogue feels tired, the puns lame and what little drama remains serves purely to move characters between action sequences. These set-pieces too simply feel like a rehash, from an early sword fight, suspiciously reminiscent of the workshop fight in “Curse of the Black Pearl,” and event the fountain set has reminiscences of the Isla deMuerta. Where is a three-way sword fight equivalent? Where is an all-powerful villain? Where the indomitable monster? And where, oh where is any sense of adventure and pirating spirit? Whether or not this extra dumbing-down is truly the fault of Elliott and Rossio or if pressure existed from Bruckheimer and Disney we will probably never know, this is an assignment they (or anyone else for that matter) should never have boarded.
One of the most offending aspects of “On Stranger Tides” is the original score by Hans Zimmer. Having provided a grand and epic score for “At World’s End,” the only word suitable to describe this music is disaster. Not only is it mixed at excessively high and headache-inducing levels throughout the film, it is largely a copy-and-paste job from the previous three. The much publicised collaboration with guitar duo Rodrigo y Gabriela to illustrate the latin flair, amounts a minimal amount of score and is extremely uninteresting. Blackbeard’s theme is what one can freely term “Inception” while the only motif of interest for the mermaids borrows heavily from “Angels & Demons.” Zimmer’s application of themes is entirely nonsensical in its rationale. Why exactly is the theme for Beckett or the love theme for Will and Elizabeth present here is anyone’s guess. To top it off, the album presentation features under 30 minutes of score complemented with several (and all terrible) trance and dance remixes. If you thought the rubbish at the end of the “Dead Man’s Chest” album was bad, think again. Even Zimmer’s most hard-core fans have complained about this product. Run away, run away, run away!
Yes, “On Stranger Tides” is just another pointless sequel. Sadly, even the worst “Pirates” yet sets up another sequel at its end that will probably see another film or being made. The box-office reception (though bulged by 3D prices) would confirm the necessity for this to Disney. But really, it’s time to lament and reach for your “Curse of the Black Pearl” DVD.
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What did you make of Captain Jack’s latest adventure? Please do leave a comment if you agree with my review or if you don’t. Also please follow me on Twitter and share the review with your friends. Thanks and all the best!
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November 2, 2010
Johannes Ruckstuhl
Preview
127 Hours, 3D, Alice in Wonderland, Andy Serkis, Anthony Hopkins, Area 51, Aron Ralston, Avatar, Barry Pepper, Beastly, Bella, Billy Elio, Breaking Dawn, Captain America, Cars 2, Centurion, Charlotte Bronte, Chicago, Chris Hemsworth, Cloverfield, Dakota Fanning, Daniel Radcliffe, Danny Boyle, David Thewlis, David Yates, Eclipse, Elle Fanning, Emily Watson, Ethan Coen, Event the Rain, Film, Final Destination 5, First Class, Future films, Geoffrey Rush, Ghost Protocol, Green Lantern, Hailee Steinfeld, Hans Zimmer, Happy Feet 2, Harry Potter, Herge, Ian McShane, Inception, Inglorious Basterds, Iron Man, J.K. Rowling, James Cameron, James Franco, Jamie Bell, Jane Eyre, Jayne Wiesner, Jeff Bridges, Jeremy Irvine, JJ Abrams, Joel Coen, John Wayne, Johnny Depp, Josh Brolin, Judy Dench, Kenneth Branagh, Kung Fu Panda, LOST, Marvel Comics, Matt Damon, Memoirs of a Geisha, Mia Waskiowska, Michael Fassbender, Michael Morpurgo, Mission Impossible, movies, Natalie Portman, Never Let Me Go, Nick Frost, On Stranger Tides, Order of the Phoenix, Oscars, Penelope Cruz, Peter Jackson, Peter Mullan, picture, Pirates of the Caribbean, Private Peaceful, Puss in Boots, Restless, Rob Marshall, Sally Hawkins, Scream 4, Sherlock Holmes, Simon Pegg, Sinbad, Slumdog Millionaire, Star Trek, Stephanie Meyers, Steven Spielberg, Straw Dogs, Super 8, The Adventures of Tintin, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, The Deathly Hallows Part 2, The Fifth Voyage, The First Avenger, The Green Hornet, The Hobbit, The Kaboom of Doom, The Mighty Thor, The Secret of the Unicorn, The Smurfs, Thor, Tintin, True Grit, Twilight, War Horse, X-Men
I get asked sometimes: What good films are coming out soon that I should go see? Well for all of you who’d like to know, here’s my take on the best of 2011 and a bit of an icebreaker for all the hype buzzing around your ears. 10 films, 10 dates (9 actually, but let’s not get technical) that you should write in your diary. Now there’s a new-years resolution! Enjoy!
All links take you to IMDb.
Release Date: 18th November (USA)
This of course, depends highly on whether you’re a fan or not. However a phenomenon “Twilight” has become and with “Eclipse” garnering praise from many corners, it’s only fair that this gets a place on the list. Following in the footsteps of “Harry Potter” and “The Hobbit”, the as of yet final chapter of Stephenie Meyers’ vampire phenomenon has been broken into two parts. It seems Bella has chosen Necrophilia over Bestiality and is expecting a vampire child (it all sounds so charming when put that way…). But it’s all to go pear-shaped if the Quileute or Volturi have anything to say about it. Expect queues of hysterical and screaming teenage girls.
Release Date: 6th May (USA)
If ye seek a hammer-wielding superhero, attend this motion picture which cometh your way in May! Also known as “The Mighty Thor”, this promises to be among the best of a rake of superhero movies descending upon 2011. And it’s directed by Kenneth Branagh, a man known more usually known for his adaptations of the Bard’s plays, this could be an absolute blast. Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is cast out of Asgard and has to make do with living on Earth amongst us humans, and ultimately becomes its defender. Also starring Anthony Hopkins and Natalie Portman, Marvel Comics might just be delivering next year’s “Iron Man” – let’s hope so. But “Thor” is only one of many. Also being released in 2011 in the same genre: Captain America: The First Avenger (22nd Jul), The Green Hornet (14th Jan), Green Lantern (17th Jun) and X-Men: First Class (3rd Jun).
Release Date: 10th June (USA)
At number eight we have an appropriate title. But really nobody knows what the heck this one is about apart from the fact it’s being produced by Steven Spielberg and written and directed by JJ Abrams (the man behind LOST, the Star Trek reboot and Cloverfield ) and the tagline “Next Summer, It Arrives”. We could call this pulling an Inception. It’s also sci-fi and a bit of horror, with aliens and Area 51 and what not, starring Elle Fanning (Dakota’s younger sister). And if it’s in any way as good as Nolan’s we sure ain’t complaining! Think you might like this? Also look forward to Beastly (8th Mar), Final Destination 5 (26th Aug), Scream 4 (15th Apr).
Release Date: 20th May (USA)
After their last escapade “At World’s End” in 2007 Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) and his motley crew of pirates set sail into theatres once again. This time around they’re on a quest to find the Fountain of Youth, a giver of eternal life. New director Rob Marshall (Chicago, Memoirs of a Geisha) should give the series a bit of fresh life. Geoffrey Rush returns as Captain Barbossa while Ian McShane and Penelope Cruz join the cast as notorious pirate Blackbeard and his daughter respectively. Will and Elizabeth will not be back but that’s not really a bad thing, their romance was getting tiresome anyway. We’re also looking forward to another cracking score by Hans Zimmer. More action and adventure releases include Kung Fu Panda: The Kaboom of Doom (27th May), Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol (16th Dec), Sherlock Holmes 2 (16th Dec), Sinbad: The Fifth Voyage (1st Jan).
Release Date: 11th March (USA)
One of the greatest novels of all time gets yet another adaption for the big screen. It’s a star-studded affair and looks to be one of the bigger hitters of the year in the drama department. Finding employment at Thornfield Hall, the young Jane Eyre (Mia Wasikowska – Alice in Wonderland) finds herself falling in love the with the house’s master the stern Mr. Rochester played by Michael Fassbender (Inglorious Basterds, Centurion) only to discover the terrible secret that lurks in his attic. Sally Hawkins, Jamie Bell, Jayne Wiesner and Dame Judy Dench (who stars in virtually every period film) make this a must see if you’re in any way interested in the genre. But you (probably) shouldn’t expect a light and schmaltzy rom-com. More possibilities for lightening your wallet may include Even the Rain (Feb TBA), Never Let Me Go (21st Jan, UK), Restless (28th Jan), Straw Dogs (16th Sep).
Release Date: 7th January (UK)
Two years ago, Danny Boyle made a small film in India which went on to win a few Oscars. Now he’s trying to pull the “Slumdog Millionaire” trick again with the true story of Aron Ralston (James Franco). Mountaineering in Utah, he gets his arm trapped under a rock. Over the following five days, he examines his life through video recordings on his camera and eventually decides to amputate his arm with his penknife. The ending isn’t exactly secret but it’s an extremely fascinating premise: With only one main character which is on screen basically all the time. And the actual amputation? Well, we’ll just have to wait and see. As far as we know, the film won’t actually be 127 hours long.
Release Date: 14th January (UK)
Now that the Coen Brothers have achieved cult status any picture they release will generate a certain amount of buzz. When they decide to remake a 1969 John Wayne classic of the same name we all have something to write home about. A 14 year-old girl (Hailee Steinfeld) hires a U.S. Marshall (badass Jeff Bridges) to track down her father’s murderer. Matt Damon, Josh Brolin and Barry Pepper also star. The trailer looks fantastic and an altogether darker affair than the original. It’s going to be a tale of bloody revenge. Not easy but essential viewing.
Release Date: 28th December
Steven Spielberg’s adaptation of Michael Morpurogo’s novel is highly anticipated to say the least and could very well be one of the big Christmas films vying for Oscar attention. Because when Spielberg does serious, he means business. It concerns a young man (Jeremy Irvine) and a horse named Joey. When Joey is sent to the front of World War I, Albert enlists in the army to save him. Like with Morpurgo’s other acclaimed novel “Private Peaceful” it’s a tear-jerker but in a very good way. Prepare to cry rivers. Apart from some British veterans like David Thewlis, Emily Watson and Peter Mullan, there’s no huge names in the cast but we know that’s not a problem.
Release Date: 15th July
We come to it at last: The end of the end. A franchise that began almost a decade ago with wide-eyed Daniel Radcliffe as the bespectacled wizard which fate has chosen to do great things, comes to a close this summer with the awesomely epic looking “Deathly Hallows Part 2”. As has been the case since “Order of the Phoenix” director David Yates keeps expanding on the immense world of J.K. Rowling’s novels. If you need any incentive whatever to go and see this, just take a look at that teaser poster with Hogwarts in flames! We know how it’s going to end of course (unless you’ve lived on Mars – although even then you would have heard by now…) but we’re still salivating over the possibilities: The Gringotts break-in (dragon!), the final battle for the wizard-school, Dumbledore and of course the epilogue. In an interview Radcliffe himself speculated on using some of the ageing technology utilised on “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” for the main trio of actors. After all, it wouldn’t be good if after seven films, we couldn’t finish with the same actors. Better keep reading the Daily Prophet for updates.
Release Date: 28th December (USA)
You can have all the vampires, pirates and wizards in the world, but the No1 film to look forward to in 2011 is undoubtedly Steven Spielberg and Peter Jackson’s adaptation of the beloved comic book series by Hérge. The first official images have just been released and boy does that CGI look great. Furthering some of the great advancement’s of James Cameron’s “Avatar”, the film will use a sort of motion capture and will then be created completely in the computer. Jamie Bell (Billy Eliot) takes centre stage as our hero with his trusty dog, motion capture pro (he did both Gollum and King Kong) Andy Serkis is the creative-insults machine Captain Haddock while comedy duo Simon Pegg and Nick Frost don the bowlers of Thomson and Thompson. While the title is officially “The Secret of the Unicorn”, it seems that the film will take elements from different books and meld them together for a great Tintin adventure. Spielberg directs and Jackson produces – they will switch roles for the sequel in 2012. Note that the release date is the same as “War Horse” which means Spielberg has a double whammy when taking on theatres next Christmas. Anyway – we can’t wait! Also in the animation or CG genre we can expect films like Cars 2 (24th Jun), Happy Feet 2 (18th Nov), Puss in Boots (4th Nov) and The Smurfs 3D (3rd Aug).
Awesome roundup! Whatever your taste, there’s plenty of movies to keep you entertained coming along next year. But as always there’s not just good movies, there’s always a few crappy ones as well. Here’s our predictions:
Five movies you (probably) don’t need to see in 2011:
5. Piranha 3DD (Aug TBA)
4. Transformers: The Dark of the Moon (1st Jul)
3. A Very Harold and Kumar Christmas (23rd Dec)
2. Alvin and the Chipmunks 3D (16th Dec)
1. Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son (18th Feb)
So that’s it! What films are you looking forward to in 2011? Leave us a comment!
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Despite all the claims that “At World’s End” would be the last of Jack Sparrow’s escapades, the promise of booty in these waters was enough to tempt both Disney and super-producer Jerry Bruckheimer. After all, despite lukewarm receptions from critics and most movie-goers, the second and and third films in the series earned Disney in the region of a billion dollars each. And so, having dropped Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley and director Gore Verbinski, the pirates set sail once more with Bruckheimer promising a style closer to the swashbuckler spirit of the original. Aside from “Chicago” director Rob Marshall, new crew members include heavyweights Penelope Cruz and Ian McShane, next to Geoffrey Rush returning as Barbossa and of course, the one and only captain Jack. Far from a face-lift however, the end product reeks of a dead formula and will have eyes rolling with yet-another-pointless-sequel dissatisfaction.
One of the most offending aspects of “On Stranger Tides” is the original score by Hans Zimmer. Having provided a grand and epic score for “At World’s End,” the only word suitable to describe this music is disaster. Not only is it mixed at excessively high and headache-inducing levels throughout the film, it is largely a copy-and-paste job from the previous three. The much publicised collaboration with guitar duo Rodrigo y Gabriela to illustrate the latin flair, amounts a minimal amount of score and is extremely uninteresting. Blackbeard’s theme is what one can freely term “Inception” while the only motif of interest for the mermaids borrows heavily from “Angels & Demons.” Zimmer’s application of themes is entirely nonsensical in its rationale. Why exactly is the theme for Beckett or the love theme for Will and Elizabeth present here is anyone’s guess. To top it off, the album presentation features under 30 minutes of score complemented with several (and all terrible) trance and dance remixes. If you thought the rubbish at the end of the “Dead Man’s Chest” album was bad, think again. Even Zimmer’s most hard-core fans have complained about this product. Run away, run away, run away!
